I’ve been an educator at a Christian school for the last 3 years. Not too long – and certainly long enough for me to be able to find a new job, but I am a little torn. The teachers here talk about their husbands and wives all of the time, and recently my kids started asking me if they would be able to ever meet my husband.
Who doesn’t look into the eyes of a 3rd grader and want to say yes to that? I love my kids dearly and I’m on the verge of nearly telling them that unfortunately, they will never be able to meet my husband. I’m gay. I’ve been in a committed relationship for a number of years; and I’m okay with it. I still believe in God, Jesus, the trinity. You know, all of the Christian stuff.
My struggle is I cannot share this with my kids. You see, I really love the values that this school instills in these children. The curriculum is dynamic. I always dreamed of teaching in a school like this. Unfortunately, my lifestyle doesn’t line up with what this school teaches and I’m certain that this is cause for termination. Of course, they tell us that there is no discrimination and there is always counseling for ‘sin’, but I don’t believe that I need any of that. Eventually, I hope to live with the love of my life for the rest of my life.
Everyday, I feel tempted to share whenever one of them asks, but I feel that it may be best to keep my lifestyle suppressed. I need some guidance from maybe anyone that has experienced the struggle of coming out and just being who I am.