My mom died suddenly a year and a half ago at age 58. She was the best, basically; her only fault was her decision to marry and stay married to my dad, who is awful.
He cemented his awful status by starting to date my brother’s friend a few months after my mom died; she became a former friend because she “joked” two weeks after the funeral that she could finally go after my dad now that he’s single. Then she did! They kept it a secret for months.
While Mom was alive I only tolerated my dad to preserve my relationship with her, and I’ve only continued because it’s important to my brother. I live across the country anyway.
But I’m getting married next year. My fiance has been an amazing rock. We want our wedding to be a celebration of my mom and how happy she would have been to see me so happy.
I’m fine with having my dad there, but I absolutely do not want my dad’s girlfriend there. It’s not the fact of him having a girlfriend that bothers me; it’s that it’s this particular woman who was so disrespectful to my mom and to my brother so soon after she died.
I know that I CAN insist on this, but is it the right thing to do?
Do I Have to?